Chapter 51: The Third Wish

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More than a year ago, the Chang twins transferred to Seijou Junior High class 2-1 to carry out their ancestor’s revenge, their alter egos being the “Dark Ones.” Kinomoto Sakura, the Card Mistress chosen by Clow Reed, was once again thrown into a hurdle of attacks, awakening in her the new power to seal dark forces into Sakura Cards. Meanwhile, Li Syaoran who had returned to Hong Kong a year after the final battle against Hiiragizawa Eriol, Clow Reed’s reincarnation, was determined to once more fight by Sakura’s side against the greater evil. As the Chosen One of the Li Clan, Syaoran had spent the year in Hong Kong wisely, working hard and enduring many grueling training sessions after realizing his deficiencies in the last battle against Eriol. Despite Clan opposition, he ran away from home to fight by Sakura’s side in Japan. However, continuing where he had left off was more difficult than he had expected; his sudden departure and time away put a gap in his relationship with Sakura. Furthermore, his cold demeanor and reluctance to open to his one time rival, companion and first love, created more trials for times ahead. Though Sakura was often hurt and discouraged by Syaoran’s unapproachable nature, circumstances nonetheless obliged them to open up to each other.

 

Soon, the two discovered glimpses of the past that were unexpected and at times shocking, such as the ambiguous relationship between Li Ryuuren, Syaoran’s father and Amamiya Nadeshiko, Sakura’s mother. Simultaneously, the attacks from the “Dark One” increased in number and intensity, while Sakura and Syaoran had to relearn how to trust each other and most importantly, believe in their own strengths. Despite his uncle’s warning to stay away from Sakura resulting in his initial brusqueness towards her, Syaoran slowly began to realize for the first time that there were matters of more importance to him than Clan honor. From the whirlpool of events ranging from the camping trip, the New York adventure, staying together in Syaoran’s apartment, summer vacation on the run in Tokyo, the Best Couple Contest, the Star-Crossed Production and the many events in between, the arguments and the laughter, the bond between the two strengthened as they became more truthful about their feelings regarding each other.   

 

What began as a simple matter of defeating the Dark Ones became more complicated as more and more people got involved. Old friends were there as always. Kero-chan and Yue remained Sakura’s faithful guardians, ready to protect their mistress at any moment. Daidouji Tomoyo was exhilarated by more opportunities to videotape her cousin and best friend, and make Sakura, and anyone else who would endure it, new battle outfits. Initially intending mischief when she returned to Japan after Syaoran, Li Meilin, still struggling with her longtime affection for her childhood fiancé Syaoran, gradually began to mature by the time she returned to Hong Kong the following spring. Meanwhile, Sakura’s suspicious but well-meaning older brother, Kinomoto Touya, was ever determined to intervene in Sakura and Syaoran’s relationship, and only Tsukishiro Yukito, his best friend and Sakura’s first crush, could appease him.  

 

New acquaintances were made also. With the trip to New York during winter vacation thanks to Tomoyo winning the Best Director Contest, Sakura and crew bumped into Hiiragizawa Eriol again, who introduced Mizuki Kaho’s cousin, Tanaka Miho. More than a year younger than Sakura, Miho was a bright but obstinate girl, easily jealous but hiding a sad past. The following spring, a phantom thief by the name of Kaitou Magician plagued the neighborhood of Tomoeda and with the episode of kidnapping Meilin and a strange knowledge of the Five Force Treasures, became tangled in the Card Captor’s life. This wasn’t the last of the inscrutable but never ill-meaning Criminal 603, who reemerged in their lives as Mizuki Kai, a mischievous new transfer student in Seijou Junior High, Class 3-1. With an addition of Miho, who moved to Japan in hopes of finding her missing older brother and Eriol, who was her “guardian,” the following autumn proved even more chaotic than ever.       

 

Chang Eron and Erika sometimes were puzzled by Sakura’s easing going attitude towards them. For though they were the “Dark Ones,” and their true identity was not exactly a secret, they might have opened up to their sworn enemies more than they had ever expected to. Recently in the ski trip, the two realized that in the end, there may be forces even greater and deeper than their ancestor’s vengeance call.

 

 

 

 

One dark and sinister winter’s night, not long after the junior high ski trip, Chang Eron leaned over the banister of his balcony, the bitter cold biting through his thin cotton shirt, reflecting upon the past year. In the past year and a half, he had participated in a violin concert, a trip to New York, soccer competitions, a musical production, a ski trip, and numerous school activities that he had read about in books or watched in movies. For the first time, he had learned to love, to forgive, to thank, to regret. For most teenagers, school was their life; it was not the case for Eron. School was merely a divergence. Yet, lately, school was the only joy in his life, the few hours he could gaze upon Sakura, the times when he could completely forget about his true task. Just a glimpse of her smile, a word of kindness from her, and he felt a strange peace at heart. The kind of feeling one had when standing beneath a sakura tree, watching the sunrays dance between the petals and catching a whiff of the flowers’ sweet perfume.

 

If he could stall for just a little longer. But even as he opened his eyes again to the bleak night, the wind whispered in his ears, “Time is running out. Choose, Chang Eron.”

 

Eron crumpled on his knees, still clasping the banister, his knuckles turning white. “I can’t.”

 

You must. It is now time,” came the deadly chill voice.

 

“I refuse to,” he gasped, clutching his hands over his ears, unable to block out the menacing Voice.

 

You cannot disobey, Chang Eron.”

 

“I am not your puppet!” Eron shouted out loud. His heart beat so rapidly, that he felt as if a hand was squeezing it. Eron dragged himself up again and staggered back to his room. “I will… I will make her mine. Then, then I’ll figure something out.”

 

******

 

Sakura propped her head on her chin and stared out at the barren trees outside the hospital window. Working at the hospital had at first seemed like a tedious obligation after joining the journalism club, but now it had become a part of her weekly routine. She was taking a break in the middle of her usual chores; she wondered if Syaoran was at the hospital yet. They haven’t had a chance to talk since the ski trip, him being busy with soccer practice and his after-school job. Or maybe he was deliberately avoiding her. You never could tell with him.  

 

“Sakura, there you are,” Yukito said, bursting into the linen room. “I need you to come with me for a second.”

 

“What is it, Yukito-san?” Sakura asked, troubled by the worried look on Yukito’s usually relaxed face. She also liked working at the hospital because it provided a chance to see Yukito on a regular basis; the long feeling of ardor had faded into a warmness and sense of familiarity. Being near Yukito always made her feel calm. 

 

“It’s Subaru. He’s been giving the nurses some trouble again.” Yukiyo sighed. Whether at the orphanage or in the hospital, the boy was always ready to cause a ruckus.

 

Subaru had been hospitalized since before Christmas. It was no surprise that he was restless. There were only few people that could handle the seven-year-old boy’s tantrums. If Syaoran or Kai were around, Subaru usually listened to them. He had a tendency to listen to Touya as well, but children tended to obey the ogre-‘nii-sama, as he was labeled at the hospital. Yet, most of the nurses were helpless when Subaru began to yell at the top of his voice. And he also unsettled the other children in the children’s ward, which usually lead to chaos and tantrum throwing contest.

 

Even down the corridor leading to the children’s ward, Sakura could already hear echoes of Subaru’s yelling. Some other children were bawling as well. She rushed into the room to the end bed which was surrounded by a group of flustered nurses.

 

“Sakura-chan, thank goodness you’re here,” said the head nurse. “Do you think you can handle things?”

 

“I’ll talk to Subaru—can you leave us alone?” Sakura said, smiling sympathetically at the nurses who filed out of the room in relief. Yukito went around to the other children, who stopped crying as they looked up to see Yukito’s reassuring smile. Without surprise, Yukito was a favorite among the children and nurses alike.

 

Meanwhile, Subaru had stopped yelling and glared up at Sakura ferociously, or at least as ferocious as he could muster. Though he had never been well fed at the orphanage, he had lost considerable weight over the past weeks. His eyes were hollow and his skin had lost all of its healthy tan. A gray knit hat covered his head—he had lost all his thick brown hair as a side effect of chemotherapy. Sakura and Tomoyo had knit little caps of varying colors for Subaru, most of which the boy had thrown out the window in his last tantrum. Sakura’s heart ached at the mere sight of him, for she knew how active and lively he usually was; he loved to run around outside, and was full of mischief and laughter. It was no wonder he was cranky, being cooped up indoors the entire winter. She asked gently, “Su-chan, what’s the matter?”

 

“Sakura-nee-chan,” he said in a broken voice, hoarse from all the yelling. “Sakura-nee-chan, get me out of here. I want to leave here. Why do I have to stay in bed all the time? I want to go back. Even to that orphanage. I miss Mai-chan, and Ken-kun, and Riku and Nozomi-sensei…”

 

“I’m sorry Su-chan,” Sakura whispered, hugging Subaru tightly. “I’m sorry, but you have to stay here a little longer. Be a brave boy, okay?”

 

“Why?” demanded Subaru, pushing Sakura away. “I’m sick of the hospital. I’m bored. And the food sucks.” 

 

“I promise I’ll take you out for pizza and ice cream next time the doctor allows you to have a break,” Sakura said, wondering when next time will be.

 

“Really?” Subaru asked.

 

“Of course,” Sakura said. “We can go to the aquarium this time.”

 

“With Syaoran-nii-chan too?”

 

“With Syaoran-nii-chan too.” Sakura smiled, patting Subaru’s head. Syaoran probably would not like the idea. He would ask what fun there is staring at a bunch of fish in glass cases. Yet, though Syaoran would grumble, he would follow along anyway. “And look what ‘nee-chan brought you.” She took out picture books that Touya had read to her when she was little.

 

“I’m too old for fairytales,” Subaru stated, crossing his arms.

 

“No one’s too old for fairytales. I used to read them to Syaoran-nii-chan too,” Sakura replied. Syaoran would probably chuck her with a cushion should she try to read him a fairytale. That was the problem with him. He never had anyone read him a nice fairytale when he was little—he spent all his time training. No wonder he turned into such a grouchy, ill-tempered boy.

 

Subaru eyed her suspiciously. “Then, can you read them to me?”

 

“Which one should I read?” Sakura said, showing him the selection and secretly sighing in relief. For now, it would be okay. Yet, she couldn’t always be at the hospital for Subaru.

 

“None with princesses and silly dresses and stuff. How about one with a knight who fights dragons?” Subaru crossed his arms, tilting his head up expectantly.

 

“I think you’ll like this one then,” Sakura said, selecting a dog-eared book, a book her brother read her frequently when she was a child.

 

 

 

On another wing of the hospital, Yukito found Touya working late hours at the office, sorting through patient’s computer data. “I thought you can go home for today,” Yukito commented.

 

Without turning around, Touya saved the data. “I had some work to finish up,” he said. He swiveled around on the wheeled chair and looked at Yukito, who looked weary. “How’s Sakura holding up?”

 

“She’s fine,” Yukito replied. “She’s a big girl now, you know. You don’t have to worry about her so much anymore.” But even he couldn’t help being concerned, because he knew better than anyone the generosity of the girl’s heart. Subaru’s brain tumor was at stage four, in the malignant stage. 

 

“That kid does things that make me worry about her.” Touya yawned and stretched. “Even when she is married, I’ll still worry about her.”

 

“I don’t think you’ll ever let her marry—you’ll probably eat alive the husband,” Yukito muttered.

 

 

 

Sakura left the hospital exhausted that night. Subaru was finally asleep, after she had fed him a meager dinner, most of which ended up back on his tray. It was long past her regular shift hours when she walked out of the hospital. To her surprise, her brother was waiting for her. “Onii-chan! What are you doing here?”

 

“I’m released for today—otou-san’s on his way home too,” Touya said, taking Sakura’s book bag.

 

“Arigato ‘nii-chan.” Sakura took her brother’s arm, and Touya ruffled her hair with a rueful smile.

 

 

 

It was a rare these days that all the Kinomoto’s were gathered for dinner. A picture of Nadeshiko in a yellow-green chiffon dress was inserted in the photo frame on the kitchen table. Fujitaka was puzzled to see his two children so quiet and pensive.

 

“Sakura-san, is something worrying you?” Fujitaka asked, pouring another ladle of chicken curry over Sakura’s plate of rice.

 

“I was just wondering, how curable is cancer?” Sakura said, poking at the carrots with her spoon. Maybe because she had chopped up the vegetables, they were uneven. Almost nostalgically, for a moment, she recalled that when she was living with Syaoran, the vegetables were always chopped up meticulously.

 

Her father looked grave for a second. “It depends on the type of cancer and how early it’s found and treated. With the advancement of medical technology, there are many options these days such as chemotherapy, radiation therapy and surgery. Yet, each case is individual, as is with any disease.”

 

“Onii-chan, you must know what’s happening with Subaru,” Sakura said, setting down her spoon and looking up at her brother who had been silent through the meal.

 

“What about him?” Touya asked, still not looking at her.

 

“He doesn’t seem to be improving at all.” Sakura frowned, for she knew the tone her brother took when he wanted to hide something from her. “Why isn’t he getting surgery?”

 

Touya heaved a sigh, nostalgic of days when Sakura took his word as supreme authority. “Sakura, think about it. It’s not even a matter of getting surgery or not.”

”Then what is it?” Sakura demanded. “Su-chan’s life is at risk. Why isn’t anyone helping him?”

 

“It costs a lot of money to be hospitalized. And it costs even more money to get a surgery. Subaru’s an orphan—he has no parents, no relatives who can support him. He doesn’t have health insurance. And the orphanage certainly does not have the money to support his surgery,” Touya stated. “The doctors are not going to operate on a child that cannot pay for his surgery.”

”But there must be a way.” Sakura furrowed her brows down. “We’ll find a way to pay later—doesn’t he need to get a surgery right away, before things get worse for him?”

 

“I told you, it’s not even a matter of money anymore. Even if Subaru gets a surgery, chance of success is very low. The tumor is in the final stage and is located in a spot that will be hard to reach in surgery. There is no point in getting a surgery with high risk, that is not even affordable in the first place.”

 

“But Yukito-san said that both chemotherapy and radiotherapy is not working out well for him. How is Subaru’s illness going to be treated then?” Sakura demanded. She pushed her chair back—she had lost her appetite.

 

“We’ll see,” Touya said. He didn’t want to mention that time was running out. That all was futile, that there was nothing that anyone can do to save Subaru. Brain tumor was the most common type of cancer in children, and in many cases fatal. It was a pity when an illness hit someone so young, one of the unfair, cruel twists of nature. Yet, when had life ever been fair?

 

“There’s something wrong with a hospital that has a patient and does not treat him,” Sakura stated, before standing up and bowing her head. “If you’ll excuse me, otou-san, I have a test to study for.” Then, she stomped off to her room.

 

Touya and his father exchanged quizzical glances. \

 

******

 

Now that the long-anticipated winter trip had passed by, there was nothing much to look forward to school. Less than three months remained till the third years moved on to high school. Nobody seemed to care about classes anymore, and there was a sense of restlessness and student attendance dwindled with increased cases of flu and end of school year nervous breakdowns. With the cold weather, there was little incentive to wake up early in the morning and go to school. In class, half the students were sniffling or coughing and the other half were drowsy and unmotivated. Sakura, too, wished the dreary winter would end, as she blocked out the monotonous hum of the history teacher’s voice.

 

“While the first outbreak of a pandemic traced to be caused by the bubonic plague happened in the 500’s A.D. in the Age of the Justinian, we are most familiar with the outbreak of the plague in the 1340s that eventually wiped out more than half the population of Europe, most commonly called then the Black Death. It was said that the disease was transported by fleas and rodents and originated in the 1330s in China and eventually spread through Eurasia.” The teacher cleared her throat and glared at the classroom of students dozing off. She continued in a louder voice, “The Third Pandemic occurred in 1855, again in China, quickly spreading through other countries. It was not until 1894 that two bacteriologists isolated the bacterium that was the cause of the Third Pandemic in Hong Kong.”

 

Sakura frowned. The 1850’s had been the era of the Great Ones. She could not help recalling the images the Fates had shown her in the Mirror of Truth of France in the Middle Ages, in the midst of the Black Death—it had been a terrifying experience.

 

When class ended, Naoko spread out the photos on her desk. “Look at the pictures I developed from the ski trip!” Chiharu, Takashi and Rika gathered around her. “This is from the ski competition—look, here’s Tomoyo-chan crossing finish before Hiiragizawa-kun. And Mizuki-kun turning a flip midair in the snowboard competition. Aki-kun on his face—you can’t tell it’s him because only his skis are sticking up. Oh, and doesn’t Eron-kun look handsome standing next to the tree? Sakura-chan, here’s a good shot of you and Li-kun. You look like a couple!” Naoko blinked expectantly at Sakura—she wondered when the two would give up being stubborn and officially start dating each other. 

 

Sakura turned over from her desk and glanced at the pictures with a smile. Leaning her chin against her folded arms, she glanced over to Eron’s long blue-black hair tied back in a simple tie. He had not spoken to her since the ski trip. Lately, he had dark circles under his eyes; it bemused her that someone as handsome as Eron could look tired and cranky. But she could not help recalling Eron’s words during the ski trip. Life becomes sweeter when I see it in your eyes, he had said to her. Truthfully, those words haunted her, because she couldn’t deny that deep in her heart, something had stirred. She didn’t like Eron in any special way, but still, when he stared at her with those desperate eyes, she couldn’t say that she felt nothing. If he had come into her life earlier, if the circumstances were different, if Syaoran had not returned, she did not know what would have happened. What really had he meant when he asked, Do I really stand no chance?

 

Sometimes, she had a feeling that Eron was amused by her. But sometimes, she sensed that he desperately wanted to say something to her, and was giving her the signals to reach out to him and help him out of his agony. Seeing Subaru somehow reminded her of Eron, for she could not help remembering that at one point, Eron was an orphan with only his sister in the world to love.

 

As if he could read her mind, Eron walked steadily over to her. She tried not to look up, thinking that if she ignored him, he’d go away, but he was already standing before her and called her name in his low, crisp voice.

 

For a second, Sakura stared at her textbook, the numbers and figures blurring in front of her eyes. Just go away, Eron, I have nothing I want to say to you.

 

“Sakura,” he repeated impatiently.

 

Finally, Sakura took a deep breath and looked up at Eron. He stared down at her almost bemused, but too grim to smile. She confirmed that it was true that Eron was either losing weight or sleep, or both. His skin had lost its pallor and was tinged yellow, almost as if he was sickly. They were both aware that even though it was break, the attention of the class was on them. From the opposite corner of the classroom, Erika watched her brother warily, while from behind Sakura’s seat, Syaoran, who had been napping with earphones on, surreptitiously turned off his music and had one eye open, covered under his thick bangs. Tomoyo merely continued to knit.

 

Sakura looked up at Eron, signally telepathically that she did not desire to talk with him at all.

 

Sighing, Eron said, “Meet me after school, at King Penguin Park.”

 

Nodding, Sakura returned to being absorbed in her homework assignment, watching Eron trod away with heavy steps out of the corner of her eyes. She could not tell if he was limping slightly, or if he was merely very weary. She dropped her eraser on the ground, giving her and excuse to pick it up and in the meanwhile take a peak at Syaoran—he was sleeping with his music on. Fine then, I’ll go see Eron and hear what he has to say then, and it’ll be none of your business!

 

The rest of the day, Sakura was distracted, wondering what Eron had to say to her. Most of her friends let her be—they were used to her being spacey from time to time.

 

 

 

Winter days were short and the crimson sun was low as Sakura sat on the swing set, swaying back and fro. The metal chain was cold against her bare hands. Eron was late—she hadn’t been anticipating that. It irritated her that he called her out and kept her waiting. She was about to leave when he appeared in front of her, as if a ghost emerging from the dusk’s fog. 

 

“I was afraid you wouldn’t show up,” commented Eron, walking slowly up to her, hands shoved in his coat pocket, quite different from his usual cocky self.

 

Sakura slipped off the swings and fiddled with her scarf fringe, not knowing how to approach him.

 

Sparing her the agony of awkward silence, Eron cut straight to the point. “Have you considered what I said?”

 

“What do you mean?” Her voice came out in a squeak—she hated it when people played word games with her.

 

If Sakura was feigning dumbness, Eron ignored it. “At the ski resort. I asked you if you really won’t give me a chance.”

 

“I’m not quite sure if I understand, Eron-kun,” Sakura said, staring at the ground, wishing Eron would take the hint. King Penguin Park was a sacred spot to her. When she was sad, she came here to cry, when she fought with her brother, she usually sulked here. But she also held many fond memories here. She did not want to have this conversation with Eron, yet she knew couldn’t avoid the question forever.

 

“But you do, Sakura,” Eron replied sharply, if not tactlessly. “I’m not going to hide anything, anymore. I’m laying my feelings out for you as straightforwardly as possible. I like you, and I need an immediate answer. You need to stop me from doing something really stupid, because if you refuse me, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

 

If she had been less absorbed in how to formulate a response, she might have heard the hint of desperateness in his plea. Instead, a dumbfounded Sakura slowly asked, “What words do you want to hear from me now? I don’t know if you’re threatening me or asking a question, but can’t you at least give me some time to think it over?” Come to think of it, it was the first time in her three years of junior high that someone had confessed to her, if this could be called a confession. If she was an average teenager, would this have been a more giddy, carefree moment? After all, the person standing in from of her was Chang Eron, handsome, charming and smart. Yet, she also knew his other side, the loathing anger within him, the obsessive and loving brother, the unpredictable strain of madness.

 

“I did give you time. And time’s running out. I need an answer right away,” Eron replied flatly.

 

Sakura looked up at Eron’s face, shadowed by the tree branches. She felt more cornered than anything else. Did he truly like her, or was he playing with her in another one of his games again? But if it was a game, she seriously had no idea where it was leading to. “Eron-kun, I want to trust you but…”

 

“Why do you have to always listen to Li Syaoran? Because he told you to be careful of me? Can’t you make your own judgment?” Eron’s eyes gleamed in the setting sun a blazing orange.

 

“How can I trust you after everything?” Sakura asked, knowing the weakness of her argument.

 

“Because you’re the one person who can, even after all I’ve done. Because you’re different from any other girl. You’re the one that I chose,” Eron said. He smirked in spite of himself. “Or more like, fate has chosen for me. I’m not stupid. I’m not sacrificing my pride here for no reason. You know me well enough. You know I won’t do this if I wasn’t serious. It’s against all my principles.”

 

I can’t listen to his words, Sakura thought. Eron could charm anyone with his glib tongue, and if she listened, she would fall under his spell. She had to trust her instincts. “I’m sorry Eron-kun. I really am. I can’t return your feelings. I like someone else, so…”

 

“It doesn’t matter. Sooner or later, you’ll end up coming to me,” Eron replied matter of fact, as if he had already known the answer and did not care.

 

Something inside Sakura clicked. Why is he so confident? What makes him think that he can possess me? Has he ever respected my opinions? “No,” she said slowly.

 

“What did you say?” Eron blinked, as if gazing upon an obstinate child.

 

“I said, never. My heart is my own, and I can’t ever like you, Chang Eron,” Sakura stated, shedding her last sense of hesitancy.

 

He grabbed her by the wrist as she tried to turn away from him. “Listen to me, Sakura. You’ll regret it later. Just say yes to me. It’s okay if you like Syaoran. It’s okay if you don’t trust me now. It’s okay if you don’t love me. Just say that you’ll be there for me and only me, and I swear I’ll make everything work out.”

 

“Eron, Let go of me.” Sakura reproached herself for putting herself in a vulnerable situation yet again. She tried to yank out her hand. Why she continued to be drawn to Eron, when she clearly knew him to be dangerous, she did not know.

 

“I warned you, Sakura. I warned you,” Eron said, letting go of her abruptly, sending her stumbling back.

 

“I don’t care!” Sakura replied, her eyes stinging with tears of indignation. But she would never cry in front of Eron. Yet, if it was a matter of pride, why did she have this prickling sensation in her chest, as if she had just let go of her balloon string and regretted it. 

 

No. He had not been joking; his air was neither smug nor spiteful, like Erika might have been were she issuing the warning. Instead, Eron’s golden eyes were sorrowful, his voice level but strangely strained as he said, “Don’t reproach me later, Sakura. I swear you’ll regret it later on. But remember, you made the choice.” Eron turned around and walked away.

 

Sakura’s knees crumbled and she sank down onto the ground, catching her breath. For a wild instant, she wanted to call out to Eron and apologize. For what, she did not know. Something had changed in Eron’s eyes, and she was very afraid of this suddenly calm demeanor, as if Eron had suddenly lost the will to fight. It was more frightening than all the empty threats he could make, all the cruel words he could say, all the dark forces he would send her way. If only she called out at that moment his name, just one more time, she knew not what difference it would have made. But he walked on slowly down the road without turning, in defeat.  

 

******

 

For hours afterwards, the image of Eron walking away down the road leading away from King Penguin Park was engrained in the back of Sakura’s mind. There was no one Sakura felt she could discuss the issue with, not her brother, nor Syaoran. But she could not hide her dilemma from her best friend at school the next day.

 

“Sakura-chan, what is the matter? You looked anxious,” Tomoyo commented the first break they had after homeroom.

 

For a second, Sakura blinked, not realizing that anxiety was written all over her face. “Tomoyo-chan, Tomoyo-chan, what should I do?” Sakura asked slowly. “I’m so frightened.”

 

“Of what, Sakura-chan?” Tomoyo asked, stroking her friend’s shoulder.

 

“Of what Eron-kun might do. He said I’ll regret it later,” Sakura crumpled her woolen gloves in her hands.

 

“What can he possibly do?” Tomoyo knew Sakura had not even been scared when Yue’s Judgment nor Clow Reed’s reincarnation, but what about Eron frightened her so?

 

Sakura shook her head. “I do know the worst he can do, that’s why I’m so scared. Maybe I should have just agreed with him.”

 

“Sakura-chan, you can’t just humor him because he threatened you,” Tomoyo said. “You don’t love him. You like someone else.”

 

“That’s not it. He wasn’t asking me out or anything, I don’t think. I think he was asking something more. I don’t know what. But I can’t be with him. He makes me nervous, because I feel like if I anger him, he’ll find away to get back at someone; he doesn’t consider others at all. I want to trust him, but I know in some matters, he barely has control over the will of the Dark Ones.”

 

“Well, you can’t be nice to him because you pity him, either,” Tomoyo murmured.

 

“I don’t pity Eron-kun,” Sakura replied. “That’ll be very arrogant of me to. After all, despite all he’s done, Eron-kun also has many admirable qualities.”

 

“Well, do you like him then?”

 

“I don’t know. Sometimes I really like him, and sometimes I really am afraid of him. I think I can grow to like him if I knew that somehow that will solve all of this. But I don’t really know where this relationship is going, because his hatred of Amamiya’s and Li’s is routed too deeply for me to comprehend.”

 

“What about Syaoran?” Tomoyo peeked at Sakura’s expression through her bangs.

 

“Truthfully, I see no future for us, as long as the Dark Ones continue looming in the shadows,” Sakura answered softly. “Tomoyo, why is it so difficult for two people to just like each other?”

 

Looking at Sakura with soulful violet eyes, Tomoyo shook her head. Why did it have to be so hard for two people to be together? Sakura liked Syaoran, and Syaoran liked Sakura, and they both knew that. Hopefully they did. Yet, they could never move on with their relationship so long as the enemy existed, so long as they were copartners in fighting a dark force. Because personal relationship and business could not mix. No, more because they both knew there would be no future for them if they did not fix the present. Tomoyo twisted the end of her long curl around a finger. Or maybe they were simply afraid of shattering what bond they had now, because it had taken so long to build. “Did you tell him about what happened between you and Eron?”

 

Sakura stared at her friend blatantly. “How can I?”

 

That was right. There was no telling what Syaoran might do to Eron if he found out. Heaven knew how Syaoran had reacted when he found out that Eron had dared to bruise Sakura. Though Tomoyo was partial to Syaoran, she secretly did harbor empathy for Eron. She understood what it must be like to be in Eron’s position. “Well, there’s nothing to do but wait and see what Eron does. But I think Syaoran needs some warning too.” Tomoyo had a feeling that Syaoran already suspected, however.

 

“I guess you’re right, Tomoyo-chan.” Sakura sighed—thankfully her friend always kept a level head.

 

 

 

Only later on in the afternoon was Syaoran was able to corner Tomoyo in the music room. “So, what did that bastard say to Sakura?”

 

“Don’t you have soccer practice, Syaoran-kun?” Tomoyo asked, gathering the music sheets from the piano.

 

“She did tell you, didn’t she?” Syaoran tailed after Tomoyo.

 

“Why don’t you ask her yourself what Eron-kun said to her?” Tomoyo smiled politely. “I have to go to choir practice. You’re fifteen minutes late for soccer practice. Anyone who’s late gets ten laps around the field, remember? It’s your own rule as captain.”

 

“I can’t ask her!” Syaoran retorted.

 

“Well, maybe you can ask Eron then,” Tomoyo suggested.

 

“I would if he had the courage to show up to school.” Swinging around the piano, Syaoran exclaimed to Tomoyo, “I know! She must have dumped him. He must be in a slump right now because his pride is hurt.”

 

Since he looked so awfully pleased with his deduction, Tomoyo let him be, gently pushing him out of the music room. What could she do with such a silly couple? If only her two best friends could become a little more honest with each other.

 

*****

 

That afternoon at King Penguin Park was the last day Sakura saw Eron. The twins ceased to show up in school the following day. Nor did they show up for their shifts at the hospital.

 

“What a hassle, and we have a game coming up,” Syaoran muttered, bouncing a soccer ball on his knee as Sakura and he waited for the bus to come. “And that Kai—he’s supposed to be our manager. If he shows his face…”

 

“So, you’re still keeping up as captain?” Sakura asked rather bitterly. The two were waiting for the bus to take them to Kinhoshi hospital after school. They had to fill in Eron, Erika, Miho, and Kai’s shifts. It was the first time Sakura had time alone with Syaoran in a while, yet he seemed to be more absorbed in his soccer ball than her. 

 

He shifted the ball to his other knee. “Can’t lose the Junior Championship Cup, can we?” As the bus drove up to the stop, Syaoran kicked up the ball and caught it with one hand, tossing it into his duffel bag. 

 

“Well, I guess you’re not curious about what Eron had to say to me?” Sakura asked, watching the bus door swing open.

 

“Not particularly,” Syaoran replied shortly.

 

“Good, because I didn’t plan on telling you anyway,” Sakura stated, stomping up onto the bus. What was wrong with Syaoran, getting angry that she did meet with Eron and then not caring at all when something important did happen?

 

 

 

Sakura had been permanently assigned to the children’s ward, partially because of Yukito’s request and partially because she was the only one who could appease Subaru now. “How come you get to work with Tsukishiro-san, while I’m stuck following around that grouchy intern (by the name of Kinomoto Touya),” Syaoran had grumbled.

 

Trying to retain a smile, she went from bed to bed, making sure each child did not need anything. She picked up various stuffed animals and picture books off the floor. Most of the children had parents, siblings and relatives constantly visiting. Only Subaru’s bedside always remained empty. He had long since grown tired of all her picture books; since he insisted he was too old for toys, Sakura was running out of ideas to entertain him. Even now, he stared listlessly out the window.

 

“Sakura,” Syaoran called from the doorway.

 

Sakura turned around and almost smiled when she saw who called her. Then she stared down at her feet, waiting for him to walk up to her.

 

“The doctor wanted to give Subaru’s charts to Tsukishiro-san.” Syaoran handed her the charts.

 

“Is that all?” Sakura asked, taking the papers. “Won’t you say hello to Su-chan?”

 

Syaoran looked like he was about to refuse, but Subaru spotted him first and waved. So, Syaoran awkwardly walked over to the boy’s bed. “Hey, kid.”

 

“Syaoran-nii-chan,” Subaru said, faintly grinning. “Do you know what happens to the little mermaid?”

 

“Doesn’t she marry the prince or something?” Syaoran looked up at Sakura quizzically.

 

“No, she can’t kill the prince to save her own life. So she jumps into the ocean and becomes foam and dies,” Subaru replied matter of fact.

 

“What have you been reading to this kid?” Syaoran asked Sakura with a raised brow.

 

“Well, I ran out of adventure tales,” Sakura said meekly. “But after she turns into foam, she becomes an angel.”

 

Sighing, Syaoran knelt by Subaru’s bedside and said, “After you get better, ‘nii-san will take you out and teach you how to play soccer.”

 

“Are you good?” Subaru asked skeptically.

 

“He’s captain of Seijou Junior High soccer team,” Sakura stated, noting that Subaru regained a spark in his eye. “Main striker with his key kick, the Whirlwind Flash, and two years as MVP player.”

 

“Ah, well…” Syaoran rubbed his head bashfully.

 

“But my brother’s better,” Sakura continued curtly. “He was star striker of Seijou High and he was MVP for all three years though he wasn’t even on the soccer team.”

 

Touya, who happened to drop by the room with his remarkable timing, smirked.

 

“Keeping an eye on Sakura-chan as usual,” murmured Yukito, who walked up beside him.

 

“Has she been spending a lot of time with that little boy lately?” Touya asked quietly, looking at the way Subaru’s brown eyes had momentarily regained that mischievous sparkle.

 

Raising a silver eyebrow, Yukito commented, “He’s only seven, you know.”

 

“No, it’s not like that.” Touya glared at Yukito when he realized that Yukito was chuckling slightly. “It’s just that I don’t think it’s a good idea for Sakura to get too attached to that boy.”

 

“It’s too late for that,” Yukito sighed. “You know Sakura’s warm heart.” His marigold eyes flickered over to Syaoran, who was slowly walking out the room without giving even a nod to Sakura. I see what he’s doing. Maybe I’ll have a word with him later on at the restaurant. Yet ever since Syaoran had been promoted to the head chef’s assistant, and began working as a full time sous chef, it was difficult to catch a word with him.

 

“Well, that aside, there’s been some hushed up rumors of a new epidemic,” Touya stated. “We’ve had five patients admitted to the hospital yesterday with symptoms of fatigue and high fever.” He flicked through the pages on the doctor’s charts.

 

Taking the chart from Touya’s hands, Yukito remarked, “That’s nothing new with this weather.”

 

“Today, they’re showing signs of hemoptysis and delirium,” Touya continued. “We got the blood samples back and the causes are unknown—the blood cell count is abnormal but no virus or bacteria has been identified as the cause. And seven more patients were admitted to the hospital this afternoon with similar symptoms. We don’t yet know if they’re related, but—”

 

“I’m sure it’s nothing we need to worry about—maybe a new strain of flu,” Yukito said.

 

Shaking his head, Touya murmured, “I don’t like the signs of this at all—they’re not just coughing up blood because of some lung infection. I’ve seen the patients. They don’t look like they’re just sick. They look…sort of possessed.”

 

“You’re over-analyzing, To-ya,” Yukito chided.

 

“Maybe. I hope so.”

 

******

 

The twins were not the only ones who were constantly absent for class. Mizuki Kai showed up to class for the first time after the ski trip, a week later, shrugging off Terada-sensei’s request for an explanation for the absence.

 

“I was merely recovering from my injuries from snowboarding during the ski trip,” Kai said with an apologetic smile. “But I’m feeling all better now. Thank you for worrying about me.” He sneezed.

 

“I was not worrying about you,” Terada-sensei muttered. His eyes flickered over to Rika, who glanced away. Did Rika look slightly feverish? He shook his head and focused back on the class.

 

Turning around in her desk, Sakura eyed Kai skeptically. “Did you finally muster enough courage to show up to school?”

 

“Eh?” Kai readjusted his blue-tinted glasses.

 

“What happened with Miho-chan? She called you out to talk to you at the ski lodge. You told me that you though she suspected. You never told me what happened afterwarsd,” Sakura said. It was a relief to take focus off herself and worry about someone else for a change.

 

“Oh.” Kai leaned back in his chair without a change of expression. “Nothing much.”

 

Syaoran glanced over to his friend and muttered, “It doesn’t explain why Miho has been missing school lately.”

 

“Eriol-kun said she caught a cold—she should be at school today,” Sakura said, trying to catch Syaoran’s eyes. He was clearly as curious as she was about what had happened between Miho and Kai. Yet, Syaoran returned to reading a book without probing Kai any further. Sakura sighed, wondering if Syaoran knew any more of the situation than he let on.

 

“Yeah, she usually comes around during lunch break,” Tomoyo commented.

 

Sure enough, there was a loud bang and the classroom door slid open. Miho entered, uniform jacket hanging loosely with buttons undone, swinging her bento box as she walked into the classroom.

 

“Hey Miho-chan! We’ve missed you. Are you feeling better?” Chiharu asked.

 

“Yes, thank you!” Miho smiled. She searched the classroom. “Eriol! You forgot your lunchbox today!”

 

“Thank you, Miho,” Eriol said. 

 

“Bye bye!” Miho turned around.

 

“Miho-chan, aren’t you staying for lunch today?” Naoko asked. “I wanted to show you pictures from the ski trip.”

 

Miho forced a smile. “Next time. I have to take a make-up test during lunch break.” Before walking out, she caught Kai’s eye and nodded. Kai sighed and as she left, he reached into his pocket and felt the cool metal of his locket against his palm. Ever since that night at the ski lodge, he had stopped wearing the locket. Still, he could not yet completely part from it.

   

 

 

The days that passed since the night at the ski resort was the longest, most excruciating week Miho had ever faced. Every day she dreaded seeing Mizuki-sempai, to the extent that she refused to go to school. But today, she was ready. She was ready to face the truth. 

 

After school, Miho waited for Kai in front of the school gates.

 

“Well, Mizuki-sempai, you promised to show me,” Miho said quietly when the young man in black arrived by her side.

 

“So I did.” Kai glanced over to the pale girl with short auburn hair tucked under a black beret. Her school uniform was covered by a black felt coat. “My car’s parked not too far away from here.”

 

“You drive?” Miho looked up at Kai, almost ready to smile, then stopped.

 

“Don’t go blabbing on the teachers; they’ll probably confiscate my car.” Kai took out his key and pressed the unlock button.

 

“Awesome,” murmured Miho as Kai opened the door to his gleaming black sports car.

 

The car ride was silent, without any music or conversation as they passed through a familiar neighborhood. Miho realized with some wryness that she no longer felt that knot in her stomach whenever she passed through her old home. Home now was in the Reed estate, with Eriol, Nakuru and Suppi-chan.

 

Finally, they came to a familiar graveyard, the one that she had always passed by on her way to elementary school. The car was parked aside, and grimly, they walked through the heavy iron gates of the Tomoeda graveyard shrouded in the chill fog of early evening. Dry leaves and twigs crackled at their feet.

 

They walked past through rows and rows of fancy headstones until they finally came to a small mound, strewn with withered flowers, with an unmarked marble slab. Kai halted so suddenly that Miho almost collided into his back.

 

“Is this it?” Miho asked, staring at the gray stone.

 

“It is.” Kai moved aside so that Miho could step forward.

 

Miho knelt in front of the mound and reached over to stroke the gravestone. “Why is it unmarked?”

 

“The people who buried him did not know his name or his age or where he was from.”

 

The soulful gray eyes that stared up at him